LIFE

6 months ago, the life i had known for 4 years came to end. It meant leaving Leeds, moving in with two friends back home and trying to make a new life for myself the best way i could whilst trying to work everything in my head out. Although it was 100% the right thing to do, it's been challenging and I questioned almost everything in my life and where i wanted it to go, and even this blog. Don't get me wrong, I've had the most amazing half a year too, I've been on 3 holidays, bought a new car, partied until the sun came up, laughed until I've cried and met some of the most amazing people imaginable. But whilst these incredible things have been happening, I've always felt pretty lonely too. I never understood feeling lonely whilst being surrounded by people but you really can, to the point where it can make you cry. I thought the best thing to do was to meet people, go on dates and find someone to make me feel together again. There was someone, and for a while i was happy but circumstances out of our control meant this wasn't to be and so once again i'm by myself again. But you know what, that's really ok. Like so so so ok. I've finally realised that you don't need anyone to make you happy, you can make yourself happy. Surround yourself with people who make you laugh, visit new places, do something that scares you and just live every day as if it's your last. The longest relationship you'll ever have is the one you have with yourself so it's important to get that right first. I know one day i'll have that uncontrollable love, and 'the one' is out there somewhere but until then i'm going to have fun on my own and have my own adventures, make some amazing memories and i'm really excited about this. I know i'll have my bad days, but as long as you have people to fall on to pick you up again then you'll be ok, because it's all you can be. 
''To actually live is courageous, most people exist. That is all.''