Every now and again I’ll feel incredibly down about my blog, I’ll want to throw it all in and have a life away from the online world. Only to realise that digital marketing is my day job so I can’t escape it even if I wanted to and who am I kidding? This blog has been my life for 6 and half years, I’d be lost without it. But it doesn’t stop the down days, it was only this week a post I had put literally hours in to (declining a social situation to finish it) have very little engagement compared to one which took 5 minutes to knock together. I often ask myself whether I’d be better off ditching all other content and just stick to eBay basket posts instead. It’s incredibly disheartening if I’m being honest. The comparisons to other bloggers and making sure you create the perfect content is a weight on your shoulders and the feeling of making sure your social accounts are growing up and not decreasing becomes obsessive too and when you lose followers you question, ‘shit, what did I do wrong?’ Ok so the new shitty Instagram algorithm has screwed things up for most of us but still, I was making good progress and now I feel like I’m going 2 steps forward to go 3 back. And what is this nonsense about Instagram themes? My God, as if we don’t have enough to keep up with lets add this to the mix! Is my background white enough? Is this product high end enough? It’s so trivial but for ‘social influencers’ posting the right image is key and when you don’t have that right image, that’s when the little bubble you’ve built for your blog begins to burst.
Not blogging full time anymore also means I don’t get to go to events and press days like I used to, it’s rubbish and I hate missing them but you know, the day job comes first and I get that I really do. I love my job and I’m very grateful to have it. But I feel like because of this I’ve fallen off the radar. Don’t get me wrong, I still get plenty of emails about new releases but it’s been months since I last heard from some brands I thought I had good relationships with. I feel like the name/brand I once built for myself doesn’t mean anything anymore and I’m all of a sudden a very small fish in a big pond.
I still like planning my blog posts, taking the photos and seeing what you have to say about them, I have some very loyal readers who have stuck with me since the beginning, so I’m not going to stop blogging by any means. But I’m seriously questioning my ‘blogging worth’ at the moment and it’s making me a little sad. I’ve read a lot of other bloggers posting similar things along the lines of... ‘’numbers don’t matter’’ and ‘’I blog because for me’’ and to some extent that’s probably true but I know deep down you care about how many Instagram follows you have or how many RT a tweet got, because I do too. By the way, I’m not posting this for any kind of sympathy; I just wanted to share my thoughts and hope that maybe if other bloggers are feeling like this too then know you’re not alone.
Anyway, if anyone has any Instagram theme suggestions hit me up!